46-
I can hardly remember high school.
I do remember my 3rd grade teacher, Mrs. Holzmer. She was my favorite teacher and she taught in room 23, which has been my *lucky* number ever since. I had a secret crush in high school (I remember that) and his birthday fell on the 23rd day of the month–a definitive sign. I’m forty-six years old today. I’ve already cried once–this is because I am middle-aged and I have hormonal issues. I called to make an appointment with a new doctor. The receptionist wasn’t very nice and that made me cry! Seriously. Very 46ish.
Yesterday evening I drove by the Lilac tree where I picked these flowers. In that moment I remembered this photo, that I took in 2005 (on my birthday.) I’m going to tell you how I feel about this photo in a video (below) but before I do that, I’m going to throw myself a little blog party and list 46 things that are on the horizon for me. I think since I’m struggling to feel positive about the past, it’s a good day to look forward
I am officially looking forward to:
1. Trey marching and playing his trumpet in the Lilac parade (tomorrow.) Note: I’m NOT going if it rains. I’m a fair-weather mom and I’m finally old enough to admit that.
2. Seeing Jane Eyre at the movie theater this afternoon with my husband. Unless of course it doesn’t rain in which case we will go shopping for flowers for our front porch. I’m so ready for my summer porch!
3. A walk. In fact I think I’ll go NOW because the sky is clear and that might not last very long.
I’m back.
I took a nice long walk and listened to Angie, Molly, Jess, Noell and Izzy talk about scrapbooking.
I met Kayce in her car on the way back up my hill.
She gave me a ride and a really nice gift.
I took a deliciously long shower and putzed around my house a little and now I am back.
4. Clark’s Senior Prom–it’s tomorrow night.
5. Taft’s Harry Potter birthday party–it’s tomorrow night.
6. My video chat inside the Creative Crop tomorrow (it’s at 10:00am pacific time.)
7. A pedicure. This is not yet scheduled.
8. A facial with my friend Kerry. This is not scheduled either.
9. Spring. This is apparently not scheduled YET either.
10. My friend and neighbor, Carolyn’s graduation from nursing school. Today at 2:00 o’clock.
11. The Mother’s Day Tea at Addie’s preschool — at 1:45 today (yes, we’ll be a little late to the graduation)
12. Visiting the Apple Store for the second time this week. I’m looking into ScreenFlow so that I can make some videos for Finding Photo Freedom.
13. Eating something yummy for my birthday. I do NOT know what this will be since my body doesn’t really like sugar or flour. Maybe more of this.
14. Mother’s Day.
15. Speaking of mothers, I am looking forward to my mother’s 70th birthday. I’m sending her something fun.
16. Speaking of birthdays, Geoff’s is on the 15th and I’m sending him on a boys’ weekend to golf in the sun.
17. Our garden. We planted half of it last Sunday. I really hope it does well.
18. Our new fire pit, that won’t be a pit. Geoff is filling in the hole that has gotten too deep and using paver stones to create a nice raised fire”place”.
19. The Hall family reunion in Southern Utah in July. Yes, it’s a ways off, but I just wrote a substantial check to my sister Chanda who is “in charge” this year and that has caused me to reminisce and anticipate all at the same time.
20. I’m totally looking forward to a visit from Chanda and her husband Jon and their children: Lucy, Liberty and Briggs. I’ve never even met baby Briggs and he isn’t really a baby anymore. They are all coming for Memorial Day Weekend.
21. Chanda’s birthday. She was born on May 28th, which in 1979 fell on Memorial Day. So, how fun is that that she will be here and I will get to help her celebrate in person!
22. Speaking of visits. Kayce and I are both looking forward to an annual visit with Kathy, who comes and helps us with our BPC business plan. Together we review and analyze and plan for the future.
23. Spring.
24. Young Women’s Camp or Girls’ Camp as it is often called. This is something that I oversee as the Young Women President of our stake. Fortunately for me, I have two amazing women who serve as director and assistant director. Camp is a big deal and takes LOTS of planning, but (I’m told) it is worth every bit of time and effort. I do remember Girls’ Camp growing up and it was always a highlight of my summers. Our camp this year is the last week of July.
25. Youth Conference. This is another event that I oversee, along with the stake young men leaders. Our theme this year is “We Believe in Being Leaders” and we will be hosting approximately 250 youth between the ages of 14 and 18 for an overnight conference. Again, LOTS of work and again, worth it.
26. Taking Clark to BYU. I still haven’t wrapped my brain around the fact that my baby boy is leaving me. Freshman orientation for summer term begins June 18th, so we’ll be driving him down earlier that week. Crazy.
27. Oh and I’m looking forward to Clark’s graduation too–Saturday, June 11th. He is the class of 2011, graduating on the 11th at 11:00am. We have family coming into town and it will be a really nice weekend …
28. … because we are also holding Clark’s Eagle Scout Court of Honor the night before (June 10th.) I’m SO hoping I can eek out one more scrapbook for him. It will be a mini-book and he probably won’t care a whole lot (now) but I’m having visions of it floating in my head, so maybe it is something I need to do for me!
29. The next theater production at Central Valley High School. Chase has been on the tech crew this time around and Trey is playing the part of the hind legs of the Centaur. I think I mentioned this, but it really is kind of unbelievable to see it in action. He is completely bent over in a very warm costume for very long periods of time.
30. I’m now officially looking forward to finishing this list. It’s rather eye-opening to realize just how many years I’ve been alive.
31. Spring.
32. I’m looking forward to the next time I can go to be and still be awake enough to read my book. It is about the life of William Tyndale who translated The Bible into English. It’s a pretty amazing book and I’m only in chapter two.
33. Finding Photo Freedom. I’m really looking forward to June 2nd and I’m really kind of nervous. I always am, but I’ve made some changes to the way in which I present the content of this class, so I’m hoping it will be a good thing!
34. To my BIG stock-up-for-summer trip to Costco. I was noticing yesterday how depleted my food storage is and all of a sudden got an urge to go bulk food shopping (weird, huh?)
35. To painting the boys’ bathroom. I ordered some cool prints on Etsy and refuse to hang them until the walls have a fresh coat of paint. Oddly I think I’m going to paint it white?!
36. A nap. I could take a nap every single day.
37. The Creative Connection Event in September. I’m nervous, but I think it’s going to be a LOT of fun.
38. I’m looking forward to seeing Cathy. Since TCC is in Minneapolis, we’ll probably hole up at the Zielske’s a night!
39. Farm Chicks! How could I leave Farm Chicks for #39 — I LOVE going to the Farm Chicks show the first Saturday in June.
40. Making raspberry jam in Seattle with my mom. I did not do this last year and we have really missed having our stash of frozen raspberry jam!
41. Chase driving. Chase is 16 1/2 but the driving thing has been a little challenging for him. Once Clark leaves for college, there will actually be a car that Chase can use and we’ll be able to really focus on getting him prepared for the driving test!
42. The Paperclipping Roundtable topic for next Tuesday. I’ll be on the show again and I’m always curious what the topic will be.
43. The future. My mother says I am in the busiest time of life with the ages and spread of my children. She reminds me that this time is also the BEST time for making happy memories — that this is the time I will look back on and reminisce about. I think life is really, really good–even when it’s busy, challenging and utterly overwhelming. I’m certain there are very good things to come!
44. Swimming lessons. I want to take Addie and Taft (and maybe even Trey) to swimming lessons this summer and I want to sit there and watch them swim!
45. Doing yoga. I always look forward to doing yoga.
46. I’m looking forward to another year of living the examined life. I still LOVE to scrapbook and I absolutely LOVE the way technology allows us to live with and share our photos and stories in so many WONDERFUL ways.
And now you can look forward to my birthday message.
It’s not much, but it is my story for today and since it is my birthday, you should probably watch it.
I am now looking forward to a movie and big bowl of popcorn.
Happy Birthday to me!
AND I wrote------
May 13, 2011 at 3:44 pm
You are so adorable! Yes, you the 46 year old!! ( I turned 50 last year! and I am adorable too) I am sorry that your health is not what you wish right now, I truly hope that you find answers and good health soon.
Your video brought tears to my eyes…things do change so much. And scrapbooking helps but life changes are still hard. My 3rd child, my sweet blue eyed boy, Sean is graduating this year and heading off to your side of the state, to WSU, in August! Although I have sent 2 others off to college, every one is hard. Every moment with him is precious and yet when I try to cling to those moments, he is off to the next thing. I even took photos yesterday of him getting fitted for his tux for the prom! (so cute!)
This is not supposed to be about me but I want to tell you that sending off my oldest son to college in 2005 was about the hardest thing I’ve ever done!! That summer we all struggled, time together was always,”this is the last time we will all do this together”. He was ready to go but nervous , we were not ready to let him go and worried…After we dropped him at WWU and drove off, we had to stop the car because both my husband and I were crying so hard. What I want you to know is it does get better. He loved college and we saw him on breaks and after he graduated he moved to Seattle and we see him a couple times a month.
I do not know what your health issues are but my guess is at least in part some of it is the stress of this huge life change that is sending off your eldest to college. I know you are proud of him, he seems a great kid, and I know you have sweet kids at home but it literally took months before we felt close to normal again after my son left.
Anyway , I hope I am not presuming too much but I hope you will give yourself a break, enjoy the times with your whole family and know that this is hard but it will get better! best of luck to you and your whole family!
AND THEN I WROTE-----
May 13, 2011 at 3:51 pm
I also wanted to tell you that my son’s birthday is May 7th! He turned 18! Every year on his birthday I take a photo of me and him with lilacs! This year I was also sad to not find any blooming lilacs (here in Steilacoom), I will take the photo when they finally bloom though and call it good!
He also graduates on June 11! and will be having his Eagle Court of Honor at the end of June! (would love to see whatever little scrapbook you made for Clark!)
So we have so much in common!
I find myself inexplicably sad though for no reason other than I do not like change and this is another big change! As long as I am kind to myself and everyone because I know why I feel bad I know I will get through this.
Sorry to ramble, I hope you understanding what I am getting at!
Happy birthday!
I really wish I could just sit down with her and have a long chat...
She is so open and honest and sharing her life and I just love her!
I also need to do a 50 list and scrap it!!!
soon!
my 46th birthday video from Stacy Julian on Vimeo.
